Category - In the News

This weekend, I'm going with my family to our usual vacation spot on North Hutchinson Island in Fort Pierce. I haven't been there since last March, so I'm looking forward to it. We go at least once every year. A typical trip to the condo entails going to the beach in the morning, playing games in the rec room, eating coffee cake for breakfast, relaxing by the pool, and going to Vero Beach to have ice cream at Cravings. The beach is the best part. While it's true that I live near a public beach, the one at the condo is private, so there's usually nobody there. I'll try not to get sunburned this time.

This is the first time I've gone there since I've had my laptop, so there's no precedent here. I'm not going to bring it because it sort of ruins the idea of having a vacation. We're also bringing the dog for the first time, presumably because we can't find someone to look after him. He's been good lately, so I don't expect any trouble. But we'll see.

Though I just said that the beach is the best part, I'm also looking forward to some good, old-fashioned R&R. I'd been kind of sleep deprived, living in a college dorm, so I was hoping I'd be able to catch up on sleep at home. I've been back for a week, and I haven't noticed an improvement. For one thing, it's bright in my room in the morning, and it's usually hot too. I could open the windows so it's not as hot, but then it would be noisy. To be able to sleep, I need to be stored in a cool, dark place with lots of quiet. What I need to have at home is one of those masks that ladies wear when they need to get their beauty sleep. I need my resting sleep.

Anyway, I'm leaving tonight, and I'll be back on Sunday night. Au revoir.

Scary stuff from Wired: FBI Targets Internet Archive With Secret 'National Security Letter', Loses. This is one of a few such cases to have come to light. Who knows how many others there have been?

Researchers have recently decoded the earliest known sound recording, made in 1860. It was scratched into a piece of paper as part of an attempt to record sounds visually rather than to play them back. But thanks to modern technology, the grooves have been converted to sound in much the same way that a stylus reads grooves on a record. This article has more, including the sound clip itself.

And finally: When you're a reporter doing a spot for the TV news, you've got to make sure you're standing out of harm's way. Such was not the case for this reporter, who got owned by a sled.

For the past few days, I've been studying for exams (and taking them). Now I'm done. So are a lot of other people. Over the past week, trucks, vans, and SUVs have been buzzing about and parking outside the dorms. People are moving out.

My differential equations exam was on Monday morning at the ungodly hour of 7:30 A.M. I couldn't get much sleep beforehand. I studied a lot, but I could have studied more. I needed a 56 on the final to get a B in the class. I estimate that I got the equivalent of 4 out of 7 questions right; if that's true, then I got a 57. Anyway, it's going to be close. I'm glad I did the optional assignment that will only be invoked if you're on the border between grades.

I had my last biology exam yesterday. It wasn't a cumulative final, which was good. I hadn't been doing as well as I wanted on the tests, whose average makes up the entire class grade. I needed a 100 on the last test to get an A in the class and an 88 for a B+. I just found out that I got a 90. B+ in the bag.

Also yesterday, I found out how I did in physics. Amazingly, I got a B+ in the class somehow. I received a breakdown of my grade. They gave me full credit for the in-class response questions (5% of the grade) even though I got some of them wrong. I did get an 85 in the final exam, as I had guessed. Even then, I still should have had a B, according to my calculations. They must have rounded up, which they said they weren't going to do. Oh well. I would have been happy with a B, but a B+ is welcome.

And today, I had my last exam: programming. I'm all but certain that I'll be getting an A in the class.

Last night, I visited my friend Andy, one of the people I'm starting the Esperanto club with. I didn't have to go very far because he lives down the hall. He plays the piano, and he wanted to know if I wanted to rock out with him. I had a lot of fun. He's really good at improvising on the piano. Besides discussing music, we also talked about computers. He said he needed an office suite to run on his Mac, and I suggested NeoOffice, which I recommend to all my Mac-using friends. For everyone else, I recommend OpenOffice.org. Both are free as in price and free as in freedom.

So, in short, good times were had by both. It reminds me of all the interesting things I've done that I haven't mentioned here. As I begin to pack up all my stuff and leave my dorm for the summer, I reflect back -- in no particular order -- on some Things I Apparently Didn't Mention.

1. As part of my college orientation over the summer, I had to spend the night in a real dorm room with a real roommate. My one-time disposable roommate was even quieter than I was, which, if you know me personally, might be hard to imagine. I had to do the talking. Anyway, his name was Amer or Ahmer or something, and he lives in my current building, so I see him every once in a while. Invariably he has earbuds in his ears. I don't know how people can walk around listening to music all the time. Open your ears, folks. You can do without your Fall Out Boy for ten minutes. (Seriously, it's getting bad. When I would volunteer for Get Carded in crowded areas, I would marvel at the proportion of people who listen to music while they're walking. At least one of my professors did it on his way to class.)
2. There was an old woman in my programming class. When I saw her on the first day, I assumed that she was doing a write-up or something to judge the lecturer, but she kept coming back every day. She looked like she was over 70. Way to go for her, taking a computer class in college at that age. Eventually, she stopped going to class, so I assume she dropped it.
3. At the beginning of the year, our RA, Shannon, made little name-tag-type things and put them on everyone's door. Although it took me about 6 months to realize it, each one was supposed to look like a little iPod with a different album cover where the screen ought to be. I had the most random album ever. Every day during the fall semester, I had this on my door, printed by a color printer without yellow ink:

   

   So random. When we got a new RA in the spring, she replaced our iPods (as I still didn't know they were) with blank CD-Rs with our names and hometowns written on them. Have you ever tried taping a CD to a door? Those things are heavy. Few of them lasted very long without falling. After a month, I gave up on trying to stick mine back on the wall and substituted my and my roommate's iPods, which had been placed inside the room when they were taken down. They've been up ever since. (My roommate's album was the Virgin Suicides soundtrack).

4. I was poking around the web site of one of my physics professors one time when I came across a link to a picture of his "famous sister." One of my physics professors, it turns out, was Sally Field's brother. And not the one I liked, either. I thought that was pretty weird. I did some Googling to make sure it was true, and I found some sites saying that Sally Field had a brother named Rick Field who was a physicist. I also found a university library catalog mentioning a video of Sally Field visiting her brother Rick at the university in 1982. Almost everyone I talked to about this hadn't heard of Sally Field or referred to her as Sally Fields. Sucks to be you, Sally Field. But I like you, I really like you. As for your brother, meh.
5. I took up a form of exercise called shovelglove in November, but I didn't really explain why. I did hint at it, however. There's this girl Ashley who lives on my floor, and she would come by to talk to my roommate, Adam. Adam works out a lot and would often hang around without a shirt on. She mentioned how she always seemed to encounter him while he was shirtless. So, one time, I had gotten out of the shower and I had a towel wrapped around me while I was combing my hair. There was a knock on the door, and I saw through the peephole that it was Ashley. Oh, no problem, I thought, since she sees Adam without a shirt all the time. So I opened the door, and she averted her eyes and said, "I can come back later!" Come to think of it, maybe it was the towel. I am not a fat guy, and I wasn't then, but it got me thinking about how I should probably work out.
6. In January, one of my suitemates apparently tried to overdose on pills. He had to go to the hospital for a while and withdraw for the semester. What I didn't mention was: he came back to the dorm to visit a few months later and seemed to be his same old self. He spent a few nights sleeping in the common room, and then I think he got kicked out.
7. Evan moved in to take his place as he had wanted to be roommates with Cameron. Evan really livened things up around this here two-room/one-bathroom suite-type thing. I already mentioned how he had a jacuzzi party by buying a kiddie pool, putting it in the bathroom, filling it with hot water from the shower, and inviting his friends. One night, he happened to catch Die Hard on TV, and after that, he started posting a "Die Hard Quote of the Day" in the bathroom. After he, Adam, and I rented Die Hard: With a Vengeance, we all got in on the act. They're still hanging up there. My contribution:
   Jeremy Irons: My only problem is that I went to some trouble preparing that game for McClane. You interfered with a well-laid plan.
   Samuel L. Jackson: Well, you can stick your well-laid plan up your well-laid ass.

My first year of college is over, and tomorrow, I'm going home. I've done pretty well in my classes. I've had fun. I've made a lot of friends, and I've learned some things. But I honestly don't mind not having classes for a few months. I could use a break. In fact, except for a friend's birthday on Sunday, I have absolutely no plans at all this summer. I think I'll try to get a job to make back the money I spent this year. I've already started working on the old resume. I'm also looking forward to sleeping in and not getting irreversibly awoken two hours early by someone singing in the shower or having a loud conversation in the hallway. The time for those things is no more. It's summertime.

But first, it's time to pack.

And throw crap away.

JungleCrazy.com lists some crazy Amazon deals. This is great for people who buy random cheap stuff online.

If you get an automatically generated e-mail with a return address at donotreply.com, do Chet Faliszek a favor and don't reply to it. He's the owner of DoNotReply.com, and his site gets innumerable e-mails every day.

From Lawrence Lessig, creator of Creative Commons, comes Change Congress, "a movement to build support for basic reform in how our government functions." He's trying to have politicians and citizens pledge to support increased honesty and transparency in Congress.

On Friday night I went out to dinner with some people from Get Carded, the organ donor awareness organization I'm in. After we put on our end-of-the-year concert, there was nothing left to do but celebrate. So we went to On the Border, a Mexican place that I went to once about 5 or 6 years ago.

Not everybody was there, but some people I knew were. After we ate (good food, by the way), there were the obligatory photos. Michael, one of the co-presidents, had an award to give out. Printed on his computer, was the "Volunteer of the Year" award, and it was given to... me! I couldn't believe it. Actually, I kind of could, but it was still a little hard to believe. Apparently I was the only person who helped out at all of Get Carded's events this year. I also got a gift card for Moe's, which is this extremely popular Mexican-type place. Many people would envy the $10 in Moe's cash I now wield.

But anyway, I really appreciated the award (even though Michael and Jehan, the other co-president, forgot to sign it before they gave it to me). I have it hanging on the fridge now. Hopefully there will be some competition for the award next year. That would be great for the group.

UF's spring football game was yesterday. It's called the Orange and Blue Game after the school colors. The Gators split into Orange and Blue teams, and they played each other. They get a chance to show off their talent, and the fans get their football fix until August.

I figured it would be a pretty big thing, but I didn't know it was going to be on ESPN. Actually, by the day of the event, I did know. I had planned on watching it on TV, but I decided to go instead because it was going on about a block away and, as my roommate said, 50,000 fans would be mad at me if they found out I didn't go.

The game was pretty informal. There were 44 minutes of play, with no penalties or anything. (A referee did throw a flag once, but I think it was due to force of habit. He just picked it up without saying anything.) The coaches were just chilling there out on the field, watching each play closely. The players went pretty easy on each other, and there was no tackling the quarterbacks. (The team doesn't want to get hurt playing against itself, you know.) After each field goal or extra point, the kicker would try it again at varying distances, just for giggles.

The atmosphere was likewise relaxed. Even though the stadium wasn't packed to capacity, there were still a lot of people there, and I saw some people I knew. Everybody had a good time, although some people left early. I can't blame them. The sun was bright. Even though I was wearing a hat and the game lasted less than two hours, I got sunburned like whoa. But I'm glad I went. I had a pretty good time.

The final score was Blue 28, Orange 14. Also: The Sun 1, Jordon 0.

Yesterday evening (actually more like the late afternoon), I got inducted into the Phi Eta Sigma honor society. It wasn't anything big, really. They had a room that was way too small for all the inductees and their guests. Fortunately, the whole thing didn't last very long. They said a few words, and then they called each person up to get a pin. Then it was a free-for-all as people lined up to get their certificates. My family came to the induction, and then we had dinner. I had lunch with them again today (at Moe's) before they left.

So now I have an official-looking Phi Eta Sigma certificate and pin. I can wear the pin whenever I want to look important, and people will think I'm in some fraternity that secretly rules the world. They probably won't know that it's just an honor society that does community service every now and then.

Here's an Ask Jordon question.

Carol: Is it possible for you to see when someone is visiting your site? Like me right now?

As with most web sites, accesses to files on this site are logged, mainly for statistics purposes and my own amusement. I can tell which IP addresses have visited the site, and what browsers and operating systems they correspond with (although all of that information can be faked). When you submit an Ask Jordon question, your IP address and browser/OS information are sent as well. I can tell that your ISP is Verizon and that you're using IE 7 on Windows XP (if your browser isn't lying), but that's about it.

With regards to the story I posted last time about Illinois state representative Monique Davis, she has apologized -- though not publicly -- for her bigoted tirade.

Can't decide between Clinton or Obama? Here's a Democratic Primary Quiz (Flash).

Here are photos of 10 Interesting Abandoned Places.

Oh, it's you again. Come on in. Have a seat.

Apparently, at the end of the year, college honor societies send out letters of invitation to freshmen who have done rather well. I did rather well last semester, so I got a letter from one Phi Eta Sigma honor society. I checked them out. They've had a chapter at UF since the 1930s, and once you join you really don't have to do anything, although you can go to the meetings if you want. A lot of other people were invited. I decided it was worth it to pony up the $40 lifetime registration fee to add this line to my resume. (Eh, what resume?)

Hm... I should (re)write my resume, especially if I want to get a job over the summer (which I do). But I'll need some help. I don't have a lot of impressive achievements or work experience under my belt. Maybe I'll just use a big font.

I also got an invitation from the National Society of Collegiate Scholars, founded way back in 1993 or something like that. They tried a little too hard. They sent me about 3 letters of invitation, including certificates, stickers for your car window or something, and who knows what else. Plus, they wanted $70. No thanks, guys.

So, the induction for ΦΗΣ is on Saturday night. I told my family how families are invited, so they're all coming, even Grandma and the dog. But my $40 check hasn't cleared yet. I hope I'll still be able to go to the thing so they can hand me my $40 piece of paper. Otherwise everyone will have come up for nothing and I'll be an embarrassment. But I gave them the check on time.

A few days ago, a UF student riding a bike got hit by a car and died. Turns out that she went to the high school that a lot of my friends went to, and some of them knew her. One day you're a student who everyone likes, and the next day, you're dead. Makes me not want to ride a bicycle. Cars are much safer but dirty. I wish I could walk everywhere.

It's always the good who seem to die young. Whoever said that was right. They're always bright, well-liked, and unfortunately tempting targets for an unexpected death. But the law of averages is against it. We should expect see some deadbeat lowlifes who no one likes being killed, but that doesn't happen. Does that mean that all people are inherently good? Or does it mean that when someone dies, everyone comes up with something good to say about them? It's an interesting thought to ponder.

Here's a story I wish was getting more exposure: Illinois state representative Monique Davis is being called on to resign after making inflammatory anti-Semitic remarks. Sounds reasonable, right? Oh, wait. Actually, they were anti-atheist remarks. Still reasonable? Good, just checking. The Council for Secular Humanism has a press release about the incident, and here's Keith Olbermann's coverage of it.

Here's a list of some of the wittiest and most scathing comebacks and retorts in history: History's Greatest Replies.

Yet another airport horror story: My Wonderful Trip To South Africa That Didn't Happen Thanks To The TSA And Delta Airlines.

Hello, Saturday. This has been the most boring day on record. I woke up around 10:00 as my roommate, Adam, was helping his girlfriend, Xandra, get ready to leave. After doing my weekly backup of my system, I went to the dining hall to eat, but there were tons of people lining up to get in there, so I went to Taco Bell. There were also tons of people in line there, but it was Taco Bell, so I stayed. I think all the people were in tour groups. Adam went fishing, and now he's apparently somewhere with some buddies. I don't think I'd want to be there, though.

Back up your files regularly. I cannot stress this enough. I use sbackup, which has a GNOME user interface. It's probably available in your Linux distribution's package manager... if you use Linux, that is. But seriously, invest in an external hard drive, and that's half the battle right there.

I've been reading Hamlet quite a bit lately. I can't get enough of that Hamlet character. Such wit he has. Even his first line, "A little more than kin, and less than kind," speaks volumes or at least sentences. Then there's this bit in Act 3, Scene 2:

Hamlet: Lady, shall I lie in your lap? [Lying down at Ophelia's feet.]
Ophelia: No, my lord.
Hamlet: I mean, my head upon your lap?
Ophelia: Ay, my lord.
Hamlet: Do you think I meant country matters?*
Ophelia: I think nothing, my lord.
Hamlet: That's a fair thought to lie between maids' legs.
Ophelia: What is, my lord?
Hamlet: Nothing.

*Sylvan Barnet says Hamlet is making a pun here. What a rogue, that Hamlet. A rogue and peasant slave is he.

Who here thinks Hamlet was actually mad? I can't help but think that he kept his wits all along. He just got a little stressed out by the whole thing, though. I do think Ophelia actually went mad, though. Is it an unfair characterization of women that they can so easily snap? Gertrude seems to have a good head on her shoulders, though, once Hamlet clues her in on Claudius's doings.

Last month, I chose my dorm room for next year: it'll be on the same floor in the same building as my current room, but on the other side of the floor. Turns out that this guy Ryan, who was one of my lab partners last semester, picked the same room. Pretty cool. But today he let me know that he changed his room to the building next door because his current RA is going to be over there. Dude must be a pretty awesome RA if he induces that kind of behavior. I never see my RA around, but that's okay. Anyway, Ryan said I could still live with him, but I think I'd rather be in the building I'm in now. It's a little closer to everything that's worth going to. Hopefully Mystery Roommate Selection will work out as well as it did the first time.

In slightly more comforting news, I might have housing secured for the year after next. My current suitemate Evan is getting a place practically across the street from campus, and if he has 3 other guys with him, it'll only be $150 a month each. If I collect, find, or steal $5 a day, I'll have it made in the shade. Not bad, I say. In fact, it meets the three C's, my criteria for an off-campus housing arrangement: close, cheap, and having cool people. I just made that up.

Thanks to everyone who commented on my, uh, little dilemma regarding the opposite sex. The general consensus is, "Jeez, Jordon, you can't learn how to talk to people by reading a book, so cut it out!" For some reason, I disagree. Actually, it's because this one book, How to Talk to Anyone, has some good pointers on making good conversation and getting people to like you. Granted, a lot of it has to do with meeting businesspeople at parties, but a lot of the tips are good in general use as well. I'm already starting to internalize a few of the simpler ones.

Luke gave me something good to chew on: "You are Jordon. Jordon is pretty interesting, but sometimes he forgets to tell people that. You shouldn't be someone else but less ashamed to show people who you are, which is not a list of _what_ you do but more _why_. For what does the history of Jordon serve as preface?" (Usenet-style emphasis in original.)

This site apparently grew out of a thread on Joshua McGee's web site: myhamsterdied.info, a "support group for hammie lovers."

41 Hilarious Science Fair Experiments. At least a few are digitally manipulated, but they're still funny.

The ACLU is keeping a running estimate of the total number of people on US government's "no-fly" list. There's also a list of some notable names on the list. Apparently the government thinks almost a million people -- including dead people, small children, and Ted Kennedy -- are terrorists. (Insert joke about Ted Kennedy's car accident here.)

It's always been my life's dream to appear on Jeopardy!. Yesterday, I got my chance... sort of. Okay, not really.

They had a Jeopardy!-type game going on at my dorm (the nerd honors dorm), so I decided to check it out. Everyone was split into three teams: one had four people, one had about five people, and mine had three people. Not very fair, I know. But I played like a pro. (We scored as a team, but other than collaborating on the Double Jeopardy and Final Jeopardy questions, we played individually.) I had the whole confident attitude down, too. We played a whole game, right down to the Final Jeopardy. Up to that point, my team had a big enough lead to win no matter what. But we got the final question right anyway, thanks to my ingenuity.

The secret of Jeopardy! is that it's a learning game. The answers are things you don't know about things that you do know. If you can guess what the answer is trying to tell you about some very obvious thing, you will get the question. That's how I figured out the Final Jeopardy, which was: "This term still had 'work' on the end when Vinton Cerf & Robert Kahn, two of its creators, used it in a key 1974 paper." I guessed "Internet." And we were right. It's something you didn't know about something you know.

Even though I didn't win anything, it was still cool. And it turns out that the questions were taken from an actual episode of College Jeopardy!, so maybe I'd have a chance on the show.

Now, for your enjoyment, here's the video for "Weird Al" Yankovic's 1984 song "I Lost on Jeopardy."

Recently, a friend whom I mainly contact online asked me to be in his will. In the event of his death, I would be given the task of maintaining his web sites (with compensation). There would be an option for his son to take control of the sites when he turns 18, but that's something like 14 years away. Say he dies in 10 years. How are the lawyers going to contact me? I won't have the same address (I'm in college, plus, my family is moving), and I probably won't have the same phone number. What's more likely to stay the same? An e-mail address.

I've had my main e-mail address for 9 years now. My e-mail service is from company that I don't know much about. I pay them for premium service by the year, but when I renew early, the next year of service starts immediately. I don't think I can trust them to be around another 9 or 10 years. But I have to have some e-mail address for this will. What's the solution? E-mail forwarding.

My web host doesn't offer e-mail, but it does offer e-mail forwarding. So, I begrudgingly switched on e-mail forwarding for my domain name at a cost of $0.02 per day. I've used it before, but I never liked it. You send me an e-mail to a beautiful-looking address that I can't reply from. You expect me to reply from that lovely address, but you get a reply back from my ugly one. It's unprofessional. So what do you do?

At first, I wasn't sure you could do anything about it. Now that I have a compelling reason to use e-mail forwarding (lest I can't be contacted and my deceased friend's sites turn into a barren search-keyword wasteland), I decided to look into ways around this mess. My first source was to refer to my web host. Their FAQ says that if you want to send e-mail that appears to be from your forwarding address, you have to configure your e-mail client to do it.

Since I use the pretty amazing Thunderbird for my e-mail, I thought that there should be a good way to do it. I tried an extension that managed to get the job done, but it wasn't pretty. I could send e-mail "from" my forwarding address, but I had to type it in manually every time unless I was writing a reply. (The extension author's English also wasn't pretty.) I figured that Thunderbird should have something like this built in... and it turns out that it does.

Say you have a forwarding address that forwards to your real address. Adapted from instructions here, this is how you can send e-mail from your real address that looks like it's coming from your forwarding address:

• Go to the account settings for your e-mail address.
• Click "Manage Identities..."
• Click "Add..."
• In the "E-mail address" field, enter your forwarding address.
• Hit OK, OK, OK, etc. You're done.

Now when you write an e-mail, you can select either address from the "From:" drop-down menu. If you reply to an e-mail that was sent to your forwarding address, the forwarding address will be selected by default for you to send from. I'm not very good at deciphering e-mail headers, but it appears that your actual address isn't visible in messages that you send.

Now that I don't have any worries about using e-mail forwarding, I'm phasing in a nice-looking theworldofstuff.com address. Problem solved!

(I eagerly await the barrage of people saying, "use gmail use gmail use gmail.")

Fitna, the controversial film by Dutch politician Geert Wilders, has just been released on the Internet. Watch it here to get an idea of the things religious extremism can do.

I don't think I get enough e-mail for this to happen: e-mail apnea.

National Geographic has a cool article on this new particle accelerator thing: "The God Particle." It's funny how many of their articles have nothing to do with geography.

Okay, so you know how I got a 15 out of 20 on my last physics test? (I mentioned it last time). Anyway, that was an unofficial score based on me comparing my scratch work to the answer key, which was posted online. A few days later, I got my actual score and it was... 13 out of 20. Something happened on the answer sheet, like I bubbled in the wrong answers, or maybe I forgot to bubble them in at all. You can be sure I won't let that happen next time.

In less disheartening news, I had a programming test yesterday that I think I did well on and a biology test this evening that I think I did very well on. We'll see soon enough, but I'm not going to make any guesses.

Last week, Sarah, a girl I asked out a few months ago but then she never talked to me again and I think she has a boyfriend, texted me, asking me to go to her orchestra concert. I thought it would be fun, so I told her I'd go. It was Thursday night, and the theme was Oscar-nominated film scores. Listed on the program was another member of the orchestra that I knew; the president of the club I'm in was a violin. (Yeah, he was actually a violin.) I got to talk to him during the intermission. I didn't actually talk to Sarah, but I waved to her, and she saw me and pointed me out to whoever was next to her. (This was before the concert, not during it.)

Speaking of which, have you ever wondered what orchestra members do before they make that nice tuning-up sound? They practice. Individually. Think of that bit from "A Day in the Life," but for twenty minutes solid. (Also, how do orchestra members applaud if they're seated with their instruments? They slap their legs and stamp their feet.)

The orchestra played music from Gone with the Wind, Braveheart, Star Trek: The Motion Picture, and Goldfinger, plus others I had never heard of. (Just so you can make fun of me, let me add that I have never seen any of those movies! No, not even [insert your favorite one here]! I know, I'd better go to Blockbuster and rent it right this minute. 'Cause I totally rent movies all the time.)

Oh, I lied. I did see Lawrence of Arabia, which the orchestra performed a piece from. For the occasion, they brought out the actual Oscar statuette that the film won for Best Picture. It was being guarded by a huge guy with a baseball bat. After the show, people lined up to have their picture taken with the Oscar. I think a lot of people thought that the Oscar wasn't real (probably because the fat guy was so comical, pointing his bat at anyone who got near the thing, including the conductor, who, at the end of the show, could no longer resist the urge to go over and pick it up), but in the program, they thanked some collection in California that the statuette was on loan from.

Anyway, the concert was really enjoyable. It's pretty cool to actually see an orchestra playing. I can't remember if I had ever seen one before, but now I can say that I have. Also, I've seen an Oscar.

Now, a quick Ask Jordon:

Alexis: Okay I was wondering if I was going to go out with this guy i like when spring break is over?

I could give the standard Magic 8-Ball answer, but I'll try to be a little more helpful this time and offer actual advice. You sound like you're asking for a prediction, but you needn't be. Here's a tip. Take matters into your own hands. That way, you have a chance of getting the outcome you want.

With the war in Iraq entering its sixth year, I just want to know why the hell this hasn't happened yet: ImpeachBush.org.

This is similar to a link I posted four years ago. (I can't find the original post; maybe I didn't actually post it here.) Anyway, this news article lists some of the more famous extended family members of the presidential candidates. For example, Barack Obama is related to a number of Presidents; George W. Bush is his tenth cousin once removed. He's also related to Brad Pitt. Hillary Clinton is related to Celine Dion, Alanis Morrissette, and a few people who aren't Canadian singers. Do you have to be half-WASP to have such extensive family records? I want to run for President just so they can tell me I'm related to Chuck Norris.

Worst idea ever: Ten Cent Beer Night.

I visited my old high school today, less than a year after graduating. I was with my sister, my sister's friend Jennifer, and the (in)famous Ed. My friend Nick and his friend Tyler also joined us. This trip had been in the planning stages for a few days, but the timing was a little unfortunate. This week there was standardized testing in the morning, so we were limited to visiting in the afternoon. Actually, that wasn't so bad, since I don't think I would have been able to wake up early enough to visit in the morning. College does this to you.

So it was about maybe 1:30 when we got there. Ed said he had gotten immediately kicked out when he tried to visit twice in December, but we encountered no problems with anyone. We just went around saying hello to the teachers we wanted to see: Dr. Singkornrat, Dr. Shipe, Mr. Mumtaz, Ms. Scott, Ms. Boudinet, Mr. Chandler, Ms. Zambrano, Ms. Zolna, and maybe some others that I forgot. (Sorry, others!) They were all the same as ever. They tended to ask the same questions about college life and things like that. And when I told them I was majoring in computer science, they all said, "Oh, of course!" I'm smart, so I must be a computer nerd. Isn't that a stereotype?

Oh, and at least two people recognized me from Beowulf: The Movie and its sequel, which are now shown to every senior English class (except for the AP classes). Me and my Beowulf buddies are basically school celebrities. (Nick, who played Beowulf, says people recognize him all the time.)

Besides teachers, I had meant to see a few students, but I couldn't find the class they were in. I did, however, run into Allison, who I had lunch with over winter break. She was getting ready to go to a track meet.

After that, we went to lunch at Bru's Room, a sports bar. It was pretty empty, which meant no one was using the pool tables. We played Cutthroat, and through sheer luck, I won the only game that I took part in. (I'd previously had a 1-1 record.) The food was good. I'd only ever played pool there; it was my first time eating there.

Then Nick and Tyler had to part with us. On our way out, we saw Ms. McFadden, a guidance counselor of sorts, enter the restaurant, so we talked a bit and had that same old conversation about colleges and things. Then we went back to school (though classes had ended) because Ed wanted to see some coaches (he's an athletic guy). As we parked, a giant Bronco with huge tires came up. It was Reed, who went to our school a few years ago but dropped out or something. Last I heard (a few months ago), he was making money street racing, and he had a bunch of cars. Well, that was one of them.

While Ed and Reed chatted it up (or played monster truck derby), my sister, Jennifer, and I all roamed around school again. I met up with Susann, whom I was trying to find during school. She took me to Gaby, who practically tackled me with hugs. (They love me there.) Jen and Danae were also there, along with this guy Richard and some other people I didn't know as well. I had about 10 minutes with them, but then it was time to go, and that was the end of my big day visiting high school. I wish I could have seen more people, but hey, that's what the Internet's for, right?

Tomorrow: the beach!

You know, Christians and atheists do have a lot in common. Here are a few Gods We Don't Believe In.

Here's one of those crazy stories that you just can't believe: Retired Teacher Reveals He Was Illiterate Until Age 48.

Popular Science has a ranking of America's 50 Greenest Cities. Not surprisingly, Florida isn't represented at all.

I'm on spring break. Woo spring break!

Now what?

Well, I'm home, for one thing, after spending a weekend at my grandparents'. Now that I'm back in South Florida, I'm looking to visit the old school. I dropped by after school one day in December, but I haven't been around while classes were in session, so I've missed out on seeing a lot of people. The teachers, especially. I have all the answers lined up for them:

"Not too bad."
"It's nice."
"Yeah."

Maybe I don't have that much to say to some of them. But I'm sure a lot of them would appreciate it if I stopped by to say hello! I'd also like to see a lot of people who I no longer see except on MySpace. Good times will be had... if my sister and I can get there in the first place. It's that darn not-having-a-car thing. Also that having-too-much-pride-to-take-the-bus thing? Complicating things is the fact that they're having standardized testing in the mornings for the rest of this week, so we'd best not interrupt. It'll have to be in the afternoon, then.

I customarily go to the beach with my friends at least once during spring break. (I only go about twice a year despite living relatively right next to it.) But many of my spring break beach buddies now go to school at nearby FAU, which had its spring break last week. Hopefully we can do something, anyway.

In Oklahoma, the recently proposed House Bill 2211 would allow schoolchildren to express their religious beliefs in just about any way possible without being penalized. Students taking science tests would be able to answer with their own beliefs rather than actual facts, and they would have to get a good grade. The child who says that the earth was created by a Flying Spaghetti Monster would have to get just as much credit as the student with logic and reasoning on his side. Disgusting. Worse yet is that Texas already passed this law (which was written not by politicians but by a group of fundamentalist lawyers), and the state's schools are suffering for it.

This would be totally cool as a real movie: Minesweeper: The Movie.

Are you extremely vain? Get a personalized doll that looks just like you!

To my surprise, the Esperanto article I was supposed to be interviewed for was published today. The reporter interviewed my friend Andy at my suggestion and never got back to me. I'm glad for him, anyway. Plus, our hopefully-soon-to-be-launched Esperanto club got a mention. From the article:

Here's the full article: Esperanto fans in S. Florida cling to idealistic language.

Okay, this is something I really can't figure out for the life of me. Why do a few of my blog posts attract so much comment spam? This old post, "Where's my trailer?", gets upwards of hundreds of spam attempts a day. (No comment spam actually gets through thanks to the two anti-spam measures I've had in place for about a year.) "Really bad Rita" is another eternal favorite for spammers, as are "Where's my trailer again?", "Tornado waste of time", "Here's to 16 more", "From the song files of Jordon Kalilich", and a few others. I find it interesting that they were all posted in 2005. Other than that, I can't find a common link. I haven't done a word analysis of those posts, but it's not like I'm talking about mortgages, ringtones, gambling, World of Warcraft gold, or prescription drugs. (Am I asking for it here?) What's the deal? I challenge my other blogging readers to find (if possible) their most frequently spammed entries. What do they have in common that's so attractive to spammers?

As I was writing this, I heard a voice call out in the hallway. That's funny, I thought in italics, that sounds like Shannon, our RA from last semester who has since graduated. Then I heard another voice: "Shannon!"

It was Shannon indeed. She was her same old bleach-blonde self with her same old Midwestern accent, though she was looking tanner than ever. She's been applying to moderately prestigious law schools throughout the country, but, frustratingly, she's been waitlisted by most of them. Since moving back home to Chicago, she's been thinking about retaking the LSAT, and she's gotten a job (at a tanning salon). She said she's here in town with her friends till Saturday, and that she'll be around to hang out with her (not so) old floormates.

And now, the links.

Read about the Curious Histories of Generic Domain Names.

Dot-com days are here again? Check out some Web 2.0 Workplaces.

In this quiz, you're presented with six paintings. You have to guess whether each was painted by an artist or an ape. My roommate got four right.