Stupid thoughts
Sat Sep 03, 2005 15:30 (UTC -5)Okay, so we all have been here long enough to know that there was this girl I was trying to woo. “Was” is the operative word here. After some thought about what we have in common (nothing), and when I’d possibly be able to see her (never), I can only conclude that this can never and will never be. I’m socially inept and I cannot break into her close circle of friends, let alone try to romance her. But the main thing that set this off is that she’s in love with someone else, according to her LiveJournal.
And that date we were supposed to go on? The one that got rescheduled and so forth? I’m sure she had no idea that it was a date. I’m positive beyond any doubt. She didn’t expect that of me because that’s not what she wants to hear. She doesn’t want to go out with me. Who would? To her it would have been a friendly outing like with all her other friends.
To straighten things out for all of you, we never went out and we were never a couple. Really.
Like I said, we have nothing in common. Music is considered the common ground by which people relate to each other. I told her what I was listening to, and she said “that’s not music.” I told her what I hated, and she said that’s what she liked. So there you go.
I don’t want to be an idiot. So I will no longer actively communicate with her in any way. I’m not going to initiate any conversation, but she can talk to me if she wants.
But as for you, don’t talk to me about it. And don’t tell her, because I think she doesn’t know.
And you know what? If I were to ask her if she liked me, I know EXACTLY what she’d say. “I like you as a friend.” And that means she doesn’t like me. So this shouldn’t be a problem for anybody (except me, but what do I matter?).
So goodbye to you. Boom, you’re off my buddy list. And your number is off my wall. What was I thinking to put it there?
When people are in love, they’re perfect each other, but since I don’t fit a mold — since I don’t devote my life to a store, a sport, or a genre of music — no one can possibly be perfect for me. Oh wait, there is this other girl, who’s given me butterflies every time I’ve seen her since I met her two years ago but she’s out of my league, as I say too much. Dumb jocks are her type. Besides, I used to think we’d go nicely together, but now I can’t picture it.
But that’s another rant for another week.
4 comments
#1 by Alisha: Sun Jan 01, 2006 19:49 (UTC -5)
Don’t take this the wrong way, but your pain has me laughing like a crazy woman that forgot her morning pills. (Eh, since this is a good many months late for commenting, I doubt you will mind.)
#2 by Jordon: Sun Jan 01, 2006 19:56 (UTC -5)
In spite of my better judgment, I don’t mind. I’m a novice at love, anyway. But you could already tell.
#3 by Andrea: Mon Nov 03, 2008 17:30 (UTC -5)
Well my comment is literally years late, but this may be the first of your entries that I’ve read that I actually can completely relate to. I like how you can tell that you’re angry, but you don’t say too much that is outrightly angry… so subtle :)
#4 by Jordon: Mon Nov 03, 2008 17:39 (UTC -5)
Your comment is better than the first one.