The World of Stuff .com

Mixed signals

It’s my considered opinion that all politicians are liars and thieves. It’s part of their job (how else could they get elected?). With local elections coming up, I’ve found further evidence to support this.

About a week ago my sister brought a sign like the one above into the house. Apparently Anita Cruz (don’t we all? I haven’t been on one since two years ago, and that was only a gambling ship that goes out for the day. I’d been to Mexico and the Bahamas before that, though, and my parents just took one to Jamaica last year) is running for the City Commission. My sister said she had found the sign planted in the yard and assumed it was put there without permission. But when my dad saw it, he said that Ms. I Need a Cruise herself asked to place it there. He said that she’s a good person, and that she’s “not a politician” but a resident of the community who understands what’s going on, etc., etc.

Of course, I didn’t buy any of it. I was shocked, appalled, and dismayed. I wanted to tear my hair out and cry. It was so disgusting. A politician going out of her way to look like she cares about the people! Nothing could be further from the truth. Who would actually fall for it?

As I was pondering this at my favorite thinking spot (my computer, which is also my favorite spot for everything else), a monstrous SUV roared into the driveway, almost crushing our Volkswagen New Beetle (okay, a slight exaggeration, but we do have a Bug). She dove out the door on a bungee cord, nearly breaking her ankle, to mingle with the commoners, I guess. Namely my dad, who was working on something with the garage door open.

Previously, she had asked to put a sign in the yard, and my dad said yes. This time, she noticed that there was only one sign rather than the two she had installed (the other was inside; my sister had brought it in). He told her that he had allowed her to put in one sign. She apologized, I guess, and, with her oxygen tanks and team of Sherpas, proceeded to hike toward the running board of her tank, which had actually started to pull small dogs into its orbit.

So, let’s review. I Need a Cruise, who claims not to be a politician, asks potential voter to place a sign in the yard. He says yes. She puts in two signs. My sister is justified in taking down the other one.

And my parents are still going to vote for her. You can almost hear me shuddering, can’t you? Ah well, I guess everyone does that sort of thing. It was just a little misunderstanding. That said, she doesn’t sound so horrible, and I guess I would vote for her too. Maybe.

The FCAT, the state standardized test, is tomorrow and Tuesday. It will be my second and (I do believe) last time taking the test. Thank goodness. It’s pretty easy, though.

Antarctic Slang. “Waitaminute,” I hear you say. “Slang in Antarctica?” Why certainly. A few scientists and military folk live there, and it’s a unique place, so you can bet they have their own lexicon. Be sure to check out the rest of the site, The Seventh Continent, with lots of information and photos from the desolate and rightly ignored continent.